I know no one wants to hear my laments about LP, but I am so devastated about his absence. He’s texted me sporadically, but I am convinced he’s gone-gone. And I am devastated. Everywhere I look, I see his face.
I should be handling this better, but I am truly crazy about him and his [...]
Archive for the ‘frustrations’ Category
Heartbroken (LP)
Posted in break-up, frustrations, moving on, relationships on December 15, 2009 | Leave a Comment »
Reflections on Date 42
Posted in being single, break-up, frustrations, moving on, relationships on July 24, 2009 | 1 Comment »
So, here’s the thing . . .
His stress and weirdness on which I am giving him a pass for another week is affecting me — and it’s making me think he’s a total asshole. In fact, I have been telling him he’s an asshole.
I am already envisioning life without him. I am already moving on. [...]
Attitude Adjusted.
Posted in change, friends, frustrations, insights on July 14, 2009 | Leave a Comment »
My brain feels functional for the first time in weeks. The past 3 days, I have been finally getting my head together, which mainly consisted of pulling it out of my “wonderful ass.”
This morning, I had a lovely chat with my long-time, semi-retired business partner BP. I have been slacking, unable to do my job, [...]
Car Shopping
Posted in friends, frustrations, shopping on July 12, 2009 | Leave a Comment »
I am having a bad day at the end of a bad week. As usual, I am stressed to breaking, except this week I do not have a car, so I have the added stress of negotiating my transportation, which adds an extra layer of suck to an already stressful situation.
It also means I am [...]
Inner Turmoil
Posted in being single, break-up, frustrations, insights, relationships on July 11, 2009 | Leave a Comment »
A warning: this is more random and more confused than usual. I am feeling a little better since I began writing it, but it’s difficult. I think I am massively overreacting, and yet, perhaps not . . . .
I am having a rough week. Lots of work, lots of stress and strife. In the midst [...]
The SO Bad Conversation 2
Posted in being single, break-up, frustrations, insights, relationships on July 9, 2009 | Leave a Comment »
Two hours later, I called him under a business pretense, but really because I wanted to talk to him. We ended the last one okay, but it had been painful and I was reeling a bit. Plus, I was pondering sending him an email telling him why my friends had felt so comfortable labeling him [...]
The SO Bad Conversation 1
Posted in being single, friends, frustrations, insights, relationships, romance on July 9, 2009 | Leave a Comment »
Today was another busy and crappy day. Lots of work and family drama, and punctuated by the last conversation I wanted to have with BFD: the SO conversation.
I was home, having just clicked off an annoying conference call, when BFD rang through. It was 106 pm.
I am not going to remember much else accurately, but [...]
Words that Haunt/Hurt
Posted in break-up, frustrations, moving on, relationships on July 6, 2009 | Leave a Comment »
I have not yet unpacked my feelings about what he said or figured out what he meant.
Whenever it comes to BFD, I am wildly insecure. I am incapable of telling him how I feel for fear of rejection, I am incapable of telling him what I want because I am not certain how open he [...]
A Valediction
Posted in being single, break-up, frustrations, moving on, relationships on July 6, 2009 | Leave a Comment »
I am tempted to send this message to BFD: “in case i don’t tell you often enough, thank you for everything.” I’ve been staring at the open email for 20 minutes. It feels like a valediction.
We just had such a strange conversation that I feel the need to cap it with a valediction, to wish [...]
“Understanding”
Posted in being single, frustrations, insights, relationships on June 7, 2009 | Leave a Comment »
I just reread what I wrote and it’s all about BFD. He is making choices that harm our relationship. I am not engaging on these issues for a very simple reason: I understand what he’s doing.
That does not mean that I agree and it does not mean that it’s okay. But, I [...]
