Heartbroken (LP)

I know no one wants to hear my laments about LP, but I am so devastated about his absence.  He’s texted me sporadically, but I am convinced he’s gone-gone.   And I am devastated.  Everywhere I look, I see his face.
I should be handling this better, but I am truly crazy about him and his [...]

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My Ugly Truth

The past two days have been a whirlwind and an emotional rollercoaster. I have still not fully processed everything and I still have things seared into my memory and other little moments are bubbling up to the surface.
In addition to the emotional upheaval and drama with BFD, I have been dealing with a crushing [...]

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Protected: The Metal Tray 3

There is no excerpt because this is a protected post.

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“Ten Minutes to Kiss” (Date 6)

I have floated home.  Okay, maybe not floated, but I am still beaming 3 hours after I last kissed LP.
LP works absurdly hard and right now, his schedule is insane.  He is working 7 days a week, often 18 hours a day.  Needless to say, we don’t have a lot of time to spend together.
This [...]

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My Favorite Exes

At the end of a hideously bad day, I met W for a glass of wine at my neighborhood dive bar. It’s not a real dive bar. It’s a hipster dive bar, but I love love love it. They have excellent food (see, not a real dive bar) and I like the [...]

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Lingering Pains

I am awake early (for me) on a Wednesday morning. I am in pain — mostly physical, but I have some heart pain this morning, too.
Last night, I went downtown for my workout with BFD. I knew he would not be there . . . he’s away on business (as usual). The [...]

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Miss Congeniality

I am currently obsessed with my workout.  Obviously.  In fact, I am more obsessed with my workout than I am with BFD.
A few weeks ago, we had a new trainer start and I have “beacquaintanced” her, not quite “befriend,” but we are warm.  She speaks to me before and after class, and she is always [...]

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An Anniversary of Sorts

A year ago, BFD and I exchanged email for the first time . . . for hours.  It was amazing and led within days to the best first date ever.
Right now, we’re not in a good place.  We may get back there, but we may not.  I am still dating him, still having sex with [...]

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The BP Affair — One Year Later

Today is one year since the start of my wildly passionate, bizarre and brief romantic relationship with my business partner BP.
In many ways, BP was the perfect first post-A relationship.  He spoiled me, protected me, and wooed me.  He is a cosmopolitan, erudite, successful semi-retired business man.  Tall and handsome, he is a commanding presence [...]

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Reflections on Date 42

So, here’s the thing . . .
His stress and weirdness on which I am giving him a pass for another week is affecting me — and it’s making me think he’s a total asshole.  In fact, I have been telling him he’s an asshole.
I am already envisioning life without him.  I am already moving on.  [...]

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