My goal since I weighed 170 was to ultimately get down to 125.  I am now 3 pounds away and I love how I look.

But . . . 

I am thinking about revising my goal downward a bit more.  First, I think I would be okay at 120 — or even back to my old weight of 118.  Second, I need to lose at least 6 pounds of body fat to hit my fitness goal.  At this point, I am not exercising, so it’s a little silly to firmly set a fitness goal, but I have lost a lot of body fat and I certainly look forward to losing more.

A, the ex, wants me to stop losing weight.  He thinks I am skinny, in a bad way.  As I always remind him, I weighed 118 when we met, so I am still 10 pounds from that weight, which might have been too skinny.

F, the business partner/dictator of my image, thinks this is perfect.  He asked me if I hit my goal and made I face when I told him I still had 3 more pounds to lose.  He thinks once I hit that, I’m done.

It’s hard to tell if my desire to revise my goal is because I need to revise my goal or because I cannot clearly tell how I look.  Is this enough?  Do I look good now?  Would I look better in another 8 or 10 pounds?  

I think I will kick this discussion to my guy friends.  They have zero vested interest, so they will tell me honestly.  Then again, all of their girlfriends are super-skinny so they may not be the best judges.

My ideal body weight for my height and frame is 117-130, which is absolutely no help.  I know when I weighed 113, I was too damn skinny, sickly, and my feet hurt in heels.  

I have taken terrible pictures of myself on photobooth every 4-6 weeks to provide a frame of reference.  I can see the unbelievable progress I have made.  I know from clothing that I am ok now.  I am receiving a lot of positive affirmation from everyone.  

Still, I am torn.  In 3 pounds, what do I do?  I think I will keep going or start exercising regularly.  I have already begun drinking wine again, with no appreciable slowdown in my metabolism.  I have started having mini kefir smoothies, with no appreciable slowdown in weight loss.

I am sticking with the plan, and I will see how I feel as I go.

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