My cousins and I have seized the reins for family holiday planning for the first time.  With one cousin in particular, we decided to have our whole family travel for Christmas.  Our mothers are actually thrilled that our generation is finally taking control.  I am the eldest and, frankly, it was about time.

We have gotten buy-in from our generation among all those in their 20s and 30s (those younger are aware but obviously travel with their parents) and our parents are all in as well.

Everything seems great except we now have a bit of a conflict on dates.  I prefer to vacation ahead of a holiday and return home on the holiday or the very next day.  My cousin is spending that time with her boyfriend/soon to be fiance’s family, so she wants to shift us to on the holiday and after.

She is pushing me to extend my trip so we can all gather on Christmas, while I cannot think of anything less fun.  We don’t do the big family celebrations — we do big family parties, we barhop, we shop.  We did this a couple of years ago, and it was great.  I got to see my extended family, open presents with my immediate family on Christmas, and then fly home to see A on Christmas.

That year, this cousin missed most of the fun by being with her boyfriend, so I am even less interested in shifting my schedule to accomodate her.  My initial reaction is “that’s just what your mother would do,” which it totally is.

I am making no commitments to her, but I know my immediate family is flying in ahead.

Since I have no sisters, I am actually tickled we’re having the same conflict our mothers have.  They travel together frequently and it’s often a power play with her mother, who is younger than mine but likes to be in control.

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