In January, I freaked out a little bit when my weight dropped to 115. Starting when I broke through 118, I wrote a series of posts about my “Weighty Issues,” obsessing with my body image problems and trying to convince myself to stop losing. I didn’t. Thanks to illness and stress, within 3 weeks, my weight dropped to 111, which is the lowest I can remember. It freaked me out and I loved it, which freaked me out more.

I am not dieting. In general, I eat a very sensible, lowish carb plan. I also drink wine and eat crackers and rice and pasta and dessert on occasion. For me, it’s always been about balancing my sensible eating with real life. I am careful in my approach and I order smartly, but I also have the damn cake if I want the damn cake.

But, and this may be the wicked pms talking, I want to lose a few pounds. I want to go back on my diet hardcore for a week (or two) to stabilize my weight at 113 instead of 115. Even as I type this, I think it’s stupid.

BUT, I feel really, really enormous today. At 116, I feel huge and my weight will be up tomorrow thanks to today’s eating. (A scone! A tasteless freaking scone.) I have been looking at my meticulous weight chart and I don’t like the trend this week . . . sticking at 115 or over.

So, tomorrow, I am back on the plan for a week. No alcohol, no popcorn, no candy, no chef’s special beef. Even with all of that, I know I am still within my comfortable weight range and I know I am still a 2/4. I feel like I want to detox for a week. There are no danger signs. In fact, I don’t even have a desired amount of weight to lose, I just want to jump back in for a low carb week.

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