I have been refreshing our local gossip columnists’ feeds and facebook to see if BFD shows up in the photos from last night.

Frankly, he should and I have already dealt with that pain of seeing him looking happy with other people.

We fought about why he was not taking me and it’s still a source of pain and hurt for me, and he says for him, but I don’t give a shit how he feels about his being an asshole and insensitive to me.

But what really bothers me — the potential for the publicness of it.  As soon as it hits, if he’s in it, my phone will ring.

My friends would call me chortling, not in sympathy, to say, “wow, your boyfriend made the paper, heh, and who is that he’s with?”

I do not want to be the last to know.

I need new friends.