Last night, I hit a barbecue, drank cocktails, ate a ton of food, so this morning, I was anxious to hit the trail and work it off.
It was cold and damp, but I knew if I laced up and headed out, I would feel better.
The trail, which runs through a big park, relaxes me. I used to wander around it and find solutions to complex problems.
Today, I just kept seeing people who reminded me of BFD. I am sure I have mentioned that BFD and I are ethnically different, so the fact that a good 1/3 of the people I saw resembled him ethnically, did have me both laughing and shaking my fist at the sky, metaphorically, wondering WTF universe?!!!
So, I thought about him on the trail and it was not good — for him. I tried to envision a future with him and it was just so empty and unhappy. LP wormed his way into my thoughts of my BFD’d future and it was just ugly and sad.
Because I was so troubled, I doubled my workout, hoping to exercise away the demons. It did not work. I just saw more people who resembled BFD and my ipod lost charge in when I was still 7 minutes from my door.
Even a bad, troubling workout is still better than 90% of the other ways I could have spent the morning.
I could make plans to see BFD, but the truth is I am not unhappy sitting in bed, recharging the ipod and watching a truly terrible football game.
I am not calling BFD, not calling LP. I am just relaxing and grateful that the worst thing that happened to me today was being reminded of BFD and realizing over and over again how very wrong for each other we have been.