Fish gotta swim, birds gotta fly . . .

I have been dating BFD for a long time now for a lot of different reasons.  It’s easy to lose sight of the wonderful things after so long and so tortured a relationship in which we were for long periods never fully engaged with each other.

This morning is a reminder of why we’re still together.

It’s a simple thing, really, but I love his brain.  He’s incredibly squeaky clean as a business man.  In an industry that flourishes on less than above-board behavior, he is ruthlessly straight.  He loves me, in part, because I see angles.  I worked in different industries than his and I have a much more creative approach than he does.

He called with an interesting business request this morning.  We spoke through it, he explained what he wants and how it can benefit me.  He also offered to give me back my car, while paying me enough to pay for the car to move it off his balance sheet to mine.  Or something.  Anyway, it’s adorable that he loves my brain.

He said, with appreciation, “you’re so dirty.”

The whole conversation left me beaming, knowing we’re close and getting closer.  I have been afraid of our lives becoming more entangled.  It’s something I’ve been dealing with for months and it’s been difficult and it’s driven me to look seriously into dating other people, etc.  But . . .  since we went on our break, he’s been reaching out more.  Since I saved him, he’s been engaging more.  Since we’re doing business now, he’s appreciating me more.  All the things I always wanted, now he’s there.  It’s about goddamned time, but he’s enjoying the real me I’d always wanted him to see.

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We both showed up at our workout tonight, the first weekday workout he’s attended in months.  It was packed and he started off next to me, chatting and happy, then moved about 5 feet from me.  The weekday workout is my thing and these are my buddies, so they loved watching us together and not together.  Throughout, the woman in my line of sight between us could not figure out that he kept talking to me and mouthing things because I was behind her.  A few of my friends kept trying to catch my eye when he misbehaved, which was often.

Towards the end, we were on the floor lying 2 feet apart doing crunches, etc., and he was chatty while I was, you know, doing freaking crunches.  I kicked him a couple of times, intentionally, and he ended up on my arm, unintentionally.  The whole thing was amusing and very, very fun.

At the end, I made sure he called the woman he wanted to speak to by the right name (he failed, but I covered for him pretty well), and I hugged Girl Trainer, who mentioned how great it was to see me back since I’d been ill and missed the last week (while he’d been away at a competition).  He looked confused, I said, B, you were [away], but I’d never mentioned to him that I was sick.  What would have been the point of that?

He announced to everyone as usual, okay, I have to get you home, as we snuck out a back door.  He’s such an odd man.

We left in what will soon again be my car (yay!) and he told me he was running me home, despite having a business dinner in 9 minutes back downtown (technically about 2 blocks from LP’s house), but he was happy to do it.  He told me again how happy he was about his decision to cancel the rest of his season and to spend the next two weeks in town.

He was sweet and lovely and kissed me though without passion, admitting after that he’s fighting a chest cold.  Grrrr.

We’re doing well.  Tomorrow is a big important day — off with BP to trudge around two of his projects, with a fun lunch.  I’m excited and nervous with so much hanging in the balance.

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