Day 2 at our local pub . . .
YM sat next to W as FM was across from me. Over time, people began to filter in, most of them were friends of FM or people who work for his company.
FM and I brazenly had conversations, again laughing about how “we are totally dating other people,” going on to high-five across the table. No one paid us much attention, as they were watching a game. The two closest to us were his employee and my bff W, who rolled their eyes.
In general, we talked a lot to each other, but mostly as a table and we were not at all connected or intimate, especially when YM was paying attention.
After W left, FM took his spot, so I was, as usual, between FM and YM. Again, we were quite brazen. I had my hand on his thigh and he leaned into me as we spoke. We clarified std status (seriously), testing protocols, and our views on monogamy. We were in a loud bar, so unless you were really listening, you wouldn’t know what we were saying.
Our views on monogamy are we why felt he couldn’t date me in the first place. He is not monogamous. He is divorced after being separated for two years. He has an exgirlfriend he ended things with within the past three months. And monogamy is not his thing. Ooookay…
We know monogamy is my only thing as I live in fear if catching something or ending up on Maury trying to figure out whose baby.
Now, monogamy for me is about sexual exclusivity but not dating or even kissing or other activity exclusivity.
So FM explained that he’s not out randomly sleeping with strangers, and I am wanting to say to him “you are not helping.” Knowing that he has women he regularly sleeps with makes it almost worse, not better, because now every woman he knows is another one.
As for me, he was rather offended by the idea that I could go out socially with a bunch of different guys and not sleep with them. He said, quite directly, that’s not me. We are only dating if we are sleeping together.
So we are sort of in this weird place, the north-going zax and the south-going zax.
But we are insanely attracted to each other.
At one point, I nearly texted him to have him meet me at the exit, as I felt like kissing him. I did not send it which was good as I likely would have posted it to facebook. Later, he asked me to step outside to discuss the crisis he’s dealing with and that had him spending the day alone and then drinking a bit more than necessary. So we go out and off the front patio to talk. I read through his letter, the response, and then I give him some friendly advice to essentially stop vaguely apologizing for a misunderstanding and hire a lawyer.
After a very few minutes, I said we have to walk back to the patio. He asked why and I said “look they need to see us.” So I walked him back over to the big glass windows and within a minute YM walked out. Of course.
I let him know we were talking lawyer stuff, which we were, so he left us alone until we went back in to take the shots that had been delivered. Lol. Because what we all needed after hours of drinking was more drinks.
As the game wound down, FM wanted everyone to bounce from our neighborhood to downtown proper to barhop. YM, who is charmingly protective and really smart, hatched a plan and briefed everyone but FM. The plan was “get FM to go home.”
We debated who would drive him. We had 8 people and 2 or 3 cars. I offered to drive him. But someone on his side of our hood stepped up. He was in a darker mood than the day before.
I hugged him goodbye, no kiss.
It took some doing and nearly a fight, apparently, I was sent to “leave” with YM while they all went to valet (yeah our pub has valet). YM and FM have a really close guy friend who is always with one or both of them. So the friend drives YM and me home (W had long left). He drives to YM’s townhouse which is close and as YM gets out the friend says to me, uh, you’re not staying?!!!
No. Weird. But I guess YM told him and forgot. He’s also pretty aware of everything. And he pays a lot of attention to the fact that his two friends like the same girl.
Actually his two friends probably like a lot of the same girls . . .
FM had been driven home by one of his people and we texted a bit after he arrived. Just to check in.