Last night, at our third stop of an epic evening, D, a darling young girlfriend who’d gone out for an evening with YM last month and ended up kissing him, was texting a new romantic interest to try to get him to join her, me, and FM at a hip bar.

Her text began: “[Plan] loves him. You should come hang out with me…” Which is adorable.  She was telling her new interest that the guy in our group was with me, not with her.

Except, she sent it to YM.

Who responded that he was home, and invited her over.

So, all of our careful “not talking about things” fell apart.  Despite that, it did not mar a wonderful evening.


The plan for weeks had been for D and I to hang out.  This week, we set it for Friday and announced plans openly among our friends.  I had invited YM, as I felt a chaperone would be good. YM declined as he had two sets of plans.  One with a group of friends, and other other, a date with a new romantic interest of his.  I had mentioned it specifically to FM when I saw him on Wednesday — we had a little gathering at his house to which I brought YM and FM and I tried successfully to look like we’re not dating.  We’re not technically dating… but we are ridiculously attracted to each other and hanging out all the time.  Apparently.

Anyway, during the Wednesday party, FM and I had a tendency to touch each other mostly when YM was not in the room, and to do so in a way that was inadvertent in appearance.  But I had asked him then to join us.  He was noncommittal.

When Friday finally rolled around, I texted him to ask where he was doing happy hour and happily all of our plans came together.  I did not tell anyone that FM was joining us.  He and D know each other, but not well, and I did not want to make her uncomfortable and I did not know how long he’d be with us.

I suppose I should interrupt my own tale to say . . . obviously, I guess I am dating him.  Since last Friday night, I’ve seen him Saturday night, Wednesday night, and Friday night.

So, everyone’s timing pushed a little and D and I skipped wine at our favorite wine bar, and went straight to a hipster hangout in the midst of hipster hangouts.  I picked FM up, as he lives really close to the place, and that way I wouldn’t be there alone at a place where I don’t go.  I’d arranged to arrive before D so she wouldn’t be alone either.

When FM and I arrived, I hugged him before we walked in, but we didn’t kiss or anything.  We sat outside on the expansive patio. It was gorgeous, a bit warm and humid with a cold front set to move through.  Because I am smart, I carried a knock off bag that could get wet, an extra sweater, and a light jacket. FM looked really great, and dressed to be out, but he’s a hipster as is D.  I was wearing super-high stilettos, with flats in my bag, and interesting black pencil skirt, a thin black silk top over a flesh-covered camisole, and a great jacket.  We could not have looked more different.

FM ordered a cocktail, I ordered club soda, as I was not exactly sure if he was buying and I did not feel like having to ask at that moment.  We sat outside at a small table and talked about family and hobbies and stuff.  It was really interesting to get to know each other better and to get some insight into our backgrounds (rather blue collar for him, and um, not for me). We talked about his hobbies and I loved hearing about him and his friends.

Unbeknownst to me, FM published his location when we arrived and D saw it and openly asked him to keep me company, not realizing we were there together.  So then everyone knew we were either together or were at least at the same spot.  After D arrived, I texted YM and asked him to join us if he could.  I wanted him to know he was welcome.  It felt important for some reason.

I bought the next round — cocktail for him, cocktail for me, wine for her.  Total tab: $16.  I love hipster bars.  He bought the round after that.  We laughed and talked and each had chances to talk one on one.  I let her know early, uh, I’d like you to keep this quiet.  Again there is an energy between me and FM, though we were rarely physically touching each other.

There was a moment where we joked about the big party when he’d told me why he couldn’t date me, while holding my ass or my hip, when we did, and then she obviously clued in that we were sort of seeing each other.

She kinda loved the whole thing and we talked boys when he wasn’t there and sometimes when he was.  Mostly, we told stories and laughed.  Smart, funny, interesting people … it’s so very cool to make new friends.  The cold front had moved in and it was rainy, but we stayed mostly outside. I put on a sweater, handed her my jacket, and we delighted in being together, until we were so freaking hungry, we knew we had to bounce.

There are several outdoor restaurants in this area, so despite the fact it was cold and drizzly, we went to a fabulous place that was so packed, we sat outside the covered awning.  We ordered and D walked to an adjacent bar to get wine.  While she was gone, I beckoned FM to lean in, and we kissed.  It was hard to stop, and we really didn’t until D came back.  By then, of course, it was obvious we were together.

We drank excellent wine with really great food, and laughed and joked.  We also ended up smoking cigarettes … I know, I rarely smoke.  Like once every few years, rarely.  We all ate everything delivered, and none of the three of us have particularly healthy relationships with food, but it was great and we were cold.

As we left, I linked my arms through theirs  and we wandered to yet another hip spot.  We grabbed a table and yet more drinks … completely unnecessary drinks, I might add, and it was then I noticed that D was really quite drunk.  I, despite again kissing FM in public at the restaurant, was not.

It was here that the errant text happened.  She had been texting her new interest.  She accidentally texted YM.  YM responded.  It was ugly.  She outed us, horribly. FM and YM talked/texted/something.  I don’t know.  FM walked outside, was gone for 5 or 10 minutes and came back in.  Part of a discussion I was having with FM and D had to to with the fact everyone knows YM has feelings for me.  We discussed the fact that D and YM had kissed. (She said he took her home and told her: “you should kiss me.” So she did.  I was a little creeped out by it.)

So things sort of went sideways here, but in general, it was still very fun. We do make an odd pair.  D remarked when FM was away from the table “he’s hot, but he’s not good enough for you.” I laughed and said, yeah, I’ve told him that. Which I did at the big party.

We still had fun, but she was getting pretty drunk and FM decided it was time to call it a night.  He got a cab for her, gave the cabbie extra money in cash, and got her address from her to give to him before we let them leave.  Then we headed off to our car and back to his place.