Made plans at the last minute to see LP, which didn’t end up happening but he’s been very sweet and very present in my life.

I turned down dates to hang out with friends, and ended the evening at the Chic Hotel Bar where I could have easily seen the Bon Vivant and realized I didn’t care. In fact, I checked the rooms out just to see if he was there, feeling quite emboldened.

My two guy friends who are there even more than I were holding down the bar and entertained us until after close, picking up all of our drinks, driving us the two blocks back to TB’s car, and scoring us bottles of water from the valet. Gotta love the chic hotel.

The next morning, as I recovered from being over served, I got a series of texts from LP, which were really sweet and made me very happy.

I finally decided to see the friend of a friend. It was … Awkward. We had sex, eventually, which was rather efficient. I not exactly sure why I did it and I am NOT proud. But I needed to do it. And I needed to do it when it didn’t matter.

To be honest, it was really hard for me to not think of BV, which sucked. I remember how he feels and smells and tastes and sounds, the scratch of his beard the next day on my face. I needed to have that not be the last time I had sex. I needed something else.

So, I did and it was unsatisfying, but I do care about him and he’s been going through a lot the last month, so I wanted to see him.

Eh, it is what it is.

Sunday, I stayed home. I’d had tentative plans to meet the Chef for drinks, but he had a last minute change, so I stayed in, knowing I did not want to go out on a Sunday after BV and I had broken up last Sunday. M called me to go out and I said I’d consider a movie, but not going out for drinks.

Ultimately, I stayed in watching the PBS shows I love and working on my closet.

It was … perfect.

More details to come…