Okay, revising the Editor’s name to Ted.
I have a massive requited crush on Ted, which is awesome. It’s been like this for a while. In fact, when I look back at our messages, texts, and email, it was as though we’ve been dating for a while. I referred to him to my friends as someone I was seeing, before we’d physically met.
It all just seemed inevitable.
It all was inevitable.
We are particularly well-suited for each other — similarly educated, similarly pampered, similarly living life on our own terms in the ways no one who loves us would want.
We seem to get each other. For whatever reason, we never stopped speaking.
I have just reread one of our early chats from July. I was on and off with the Bon Vivant, who was back home with his family, back detoxing. I felt single. I acted single. We were trying to schedule a date. He was insistent, I was reticent. He convinced me. I ultimately bailed.
But, we had an easy way. We were only looking for the opportunity to meet. I was not convinced we would have a romantic connection. I thought he was too attractive. The idea of him made me insecure. So, I turned down every invite, and then I made invitations to him that he missed or turned down.
So, when we finally met, I kept thinking . . . friend-date, friend-date, friend-date . . . as I found him intimidating. Every time I am with someone real, I find them intimidating, which is something I doubt I ever thought about BV.
So, I convinced myself it was a friend thing. Even at his house. Until we held hands. And then I knew.
Our second date was a disaster, coming only a day after I’d left his bed. Our third date looked to match it, until all the bullshit receded and it was wonderful.
This week, we’ve been in touch daily, looking for plans to make, knowing we’d be spending a night together this week.
I started to reread our old messages to confirm (1) that it has always felt like it was relationship-y, and (2) when I ended things with BV, with whom I texted tonight.
We have a certainty that has always been there. I saw a note from him inviting me — a woman he had not yet then met — to go with him and some friends for a beach weekend. It didn’t seem that strange. I wouldn’t have gone, but I thought it was a great invitation.
It has been under two weeks since we met in person, but we are making out public debut at a fundraiser with my friends on Friday. My girlfriend RA gave me the tickets (and gave tickets to the Software Developer SD and his new girlfriend who is also a friend of mine) and the Hot Blonde and her boyfriend will be there, too. I told him my best girlfriend is on the board, so he knows we will be among my friends. He’s excited about it.
And, we know we will be spending the night together on Friday night.
I have spoken to him via text or email daily since our third date. I acknowledged to myself and most of my friends that we are dating.
Under two weeks, things feel solid and we are looking down the road a bit. We know we will spend one night a week together. He has made the request for his friend to spend one night a week elsewhere while she is staying with him, simply so we can be together.
I have no idea what the future holds, but I like how comfortable I feel where we are. I am just surprised it’s only been just under two weeks. It feels much much longer because we have been speaking for so long.