In November, I chose to embrace joy in all things. I made questionable decisions, did some very stupid things, but I did them to always say yes to joy. There was one question: will this make me happy? If so, I did it. I lived without concern for consequences, aware, in many ways, that I was living on borrowed time, knowing at any moment that with a knock on my door, my life would change in horrible ways.

By choosing joy, I had adventures, danced all night several times, met the Long-Distance Fling, partied openly, and lived every single minute as if it could be my last. In doing that, I seemed to have reoriented my life in amazing ways.

I am geniunely happier and more balanced. I am making better choices. I have had setbacks, generally related to my eating disorder and champagne consumption.

So that leads us to December, which has been filled with reconciliations and forgiveness and more reconciliations: the Bon Vivant, a minor character in a bizarre thing that happened with the Bon Vivant, my mother, my girlfriend C, and LP.

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